Time to put the “Remdog” Down.
What’s the best part about the baseball regular season winding down? Is it our beloved Sox going in with a shot at going from “Cursed” to “Mini Dynasty” in just three years? Well that’s all well and good, but there’s something even better about no more regular season.
No more Jerry Remy for six whole months!
What happened to this guy? He went from only a horrendous regional accent holding him back from being one of most respected baseball color men in all of baseball to an insufferable pitchman who, when he does take a break from hawking anything that is nailed to floor, his in game insight has veered more towards the banal. We’re seriously talking about being two steps away from Tim McCarver “In order for a pitcher to get outs he has to throw strikes” territory here.
Here’s the short list of what this guy is a pitchman for: window treatments, Sovereign bank, Bank of America (isn’t that a conflict of interest, Dunkin Donuts, his own hot dog stand outside the ballpark, signed score cards, tee shirts, Matsuzaka headbands and his own website. It’s bad enough I have to see his orange tanned mustachioed face on every damn commercial between innings, but can YOU STICK TO CALLING THE GAME AND MAYBE SHEDDING SOME INSIGHT INTO WHAT’S GOING ON ON THE GODDAMNED FIELD RATHER THAN FILL IN EVERY SECOND WITH A PROMO READ?!? If it’s the bottom of the eighth and the tying runner ninety feet away against the Yankees, do you think you could hold off on telling me about the sweet deal on mattresses at Jordon’s furniture? Also, the Wally the Green monster beanie got old three seasons ago. Drop it.
Of course, the above would at least be palatable if it weren’t for this agony that is his nightly stumping for the fictional title President of “Red Sox Nation” Every night it’s the same shtick, with Jerry talking about “being a man of the people” and how he’s “getting out on the street shaking hands with the common folk”. Meanwhile the camera is focused on Orsillio fawning over Jerry like a lovesick puppy in the booth while Pedroia is lacing a two run double down the right field line. It’s embarrassing to hear a grown man make a fool of himself every night. I didn’t tune on for the “Remy Show, featuring special guests, the BoSox Nine. I tuned in to watch a ball game, not an infomercial mixed with a bad WB sitcom. For nearly three hours every damn broadcast it’s the same schlock. There was a DEBATE for this crap that NESN is showing tomorrow night.
If this keeps up, I predict there’s going to me a mass revolt in Sox fandom by 2009. We’ll take a lot of things: we’ll get gouged on ticket prices, we’ll pay too much for parking, we’ll cram our bodies into seats meant for folks half our size and face right field instead of home plate but what we won’t sit on forever is this drivel from the booth. Right? Anyone with me?